How dare I try to give him my star?

Ok so, I met him. We had a great time together and then the commuication drops off. Then after a plea for him to "please be honest with me", I get a text yesterday explaining that it either happens or it doesn't, and for him it didn't. He continued to explain that what we had on the phone and in email didn't translate in person. (Whatever that means!)

I am the same loving, passionate, fun woman on the phone, in person and on paper. After some tears, bawling so hard I almost choked and some great meals with amazing women, I realized that I had started to "give him my star". My happiness doesn't not depend on a man loving me, rather my happiness depends on me loving me. This is something I tend to forget quite often. So here I go again. Refocusing on me and what I get to have in my life.

I am going on a trip next year to Venezuela. I served my mission 11 years ago in Venezuela and it's time I go back. I will be going with my friend Kristi who also served there. We are shooting for July 2011. What does this mean for me? Saving money, staying focused, working on me (physically, spiritually, mentally, emotionally), and remembering that it's my star. Anyone else who I try to give it to will drop it and it will shatter into a million pieces. That's already happened too many damn times. NO more!!