A roller coaster of emotions

I have found myself on a roller coaster of emotions lately.  Is that just part of life?  Or am I being moody or extra sensitive lately?

I do have a lot going on which could be why.  Here is what I am feeling could be why....

A long distance marriage, so to speak.  Paul is home for three weeks then gone at work for three weeks.  I love when he is home.  I love having him sleep next to me every night.  He provides me with such a sense of security.  I love having the "how was your day" conversation in the evenings.  I love looking at him across the table and knowing he is mine forever.  I love laughing with him and holding hands when we walk.  I love when he comes home after working on his Jeep, stinking of oil and gas - because it reminds me of how manly he is.  I love this man! When he is gone, I smile even though I miss him. I get back into a routine of being a bit more independent.  So when he comes home again, there is an adjustment period.  This last time I just laid in bed and cried for no reason one night.  Poor Paul laid next to me and rubbed my back while I sobbed for no reason.   Then he held me and told me that he loved me.  I cried a little more and then felt better.  I am so glad he loves me even when I am a blubbering, crazy woman that cries for no reason.  

I know that things change.  But I am struggling with how my friendships with my two best friends have changed so drastically in the last few months.  Craig is busy in with his kids and his relationship.  Jenna has been busy with Isaiah's baseball, a boyfriend, other friends and other things I guess....I miss the closeness we used to share.  It makes me sad when she talks about someone else as her BFF :(  

Paul and I have had some pretty important conversations in the last month too.

Where do we want to be in 5 years?  Where will we live?  Alaska? Washington?

And the whole having kids thing...I just turned 36, 2 weeks ago.  I told Paul,  we needed to get this show on the road.  He lovingly answered, "Whenever you're ready babe."  So friends, pray that I preggers soon.

I guess it's just part life's journey.  I am praying for calmer waters.  :)